Rather than trying to round up and deport 12 million allegedly illegal aliens (along with who knows how many terrorists hiding out in places like Omaha), it would be much more efficient for Donald Trump and his followers to simply migrate to the American colony of Costa Rica.
Our country would save 50 billion dollars or more in legal expenses and salaries for tens of thousands of new Federal Marshals. We’d also be freed of his endlessly repeated noise.
But Donald would benefit too. He could get a real tan simply by going outside and taking off his hair. He’d have an endless supply of Taco bowls, along with thousands of stunning Latina girls to wait upon him.
And with all those girls at hand, he’d also have the perfect permanent home for a new Miss Underverse Pageant, focused solely on bras and thongs. No need to stage his pageants in far off dismal locations like Moscow. Even better, freed from the boring American TV network prudes, he could finally have the clothing-optional beach event he’s doubtless always dreamed about.
Best of all, Donald could create a real Trump University in Costa Rica for his followers, far from the annoying U.S. courts and biased anti-Trump judges. And think of all the fetching young Latina coeds he’d be able to personally instruct in the art of the deal! One among them could easily become Trophy Wife Number Four.
But the compelling physical attraction for the Donald would not be the adoring girls. He’s the greatest builder in the history of the world, as he will be the first to tell you. He could make billions from building the new casino and golf resorts his people would need. He could even hire his followers and the ex-pat residents to build the new Trump towers, condos, marinas, hotels and supermarkets. But on second thought, he’d probably hire the much cheaper locals, if any have not already left Costa Rica for the US.
Think this is stone cold crazy?
Think again. With all the billions he’ll claim to be bringing into the country, he’d basically be the King of Costa Rica within months. Finally, he could be a real king of something a little more impressive than an oversized airplane with gold faucets.
He’d jump at that. Not to mention those sultry chiquitas…